Do you find yourself tiptoeing around the feelings of others? Do others' needs and desires often precede your own? Do you wish you knew how to balance it all? Do you desire healthy relationships and to feel truly happy with your life?
Priya Rana Kapoor being interviewed by CCN about her book Give Yourself Permission to Live Your Life (Balboa Press, 2014)
Many people feel they’re living a life and occupying careers they never completely chose for themselves. Suddenly, they see many of the decisions they’ve made over the years were done in an effort to fit in or gain approval. Some made choices based upon what they believed their parents or society had told them where appropriate. Somewhere along the line, they stopped following their own hearts. One decision led to another, and they lost track of the hopes and dreams they held in early adulthood. They thought that by putting themselves first they were acting selfishly. However, somewhere deep down, they found themselves battling with the insidious feeling that they were not as happy or fulfilled as they could be. They were in a place where they no longer even allow themselves to think about what they might want to do or be.
I have been lucky enough to work with a wide range of amazing clients: people from different ethnic backgrounds, professions, and life experiences; men and women, young and old. The issues they’ve worked through are similarly diverse. They all have their own stories, wants, needs, and fears, and they bring those with them as they travel this life journey. Not one is the same as any other, yet over the years, I’ve noticed many share one very interesting characteristic: they’re not giving themselves permission to live their best lives. This controversial but simple concept lies at the root of all sorts of other issues that often cause difficulty and stress. This challenging phrase can stand between them and the lives they feel they just might deserve.
In seminars, workshops, and individual coaching sessions, I regularly address the concept of personal responsibility. I strongly believe we are all leaders of our own lives, and that we have the power and responsibility to take action, to make change. Of course, we have responsibilities to others and to society as a whole, but we have the ultimate say in what happens in our lives. Things out of our control may happen to us, but we can decide how we react to or feel about them, and how we move forward. This is not immediately evident to many, and sometimes we give away this personal power.